I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
