so that wasnt chicken after all
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
