The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
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