I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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