I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
This baby is an asshole
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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