Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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