you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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