So drunk its hurt
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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