i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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