Im at strip club and am horny
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
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