Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
