Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
