I don't think brook has ever known best
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
