people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
