i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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