shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
