haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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