what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
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