Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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