who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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