Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
