Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
OPIZZABONMYDICK
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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