Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
