Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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