Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
