dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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