Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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