This girl is more easily done than said...
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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