i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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