pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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