Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Come share oat with me in your robe
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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