went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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