I'm eating all of the evidence.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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