Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
