I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
