You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Shame - the story of my life.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
