Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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