you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
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