hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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