They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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