This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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