He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
