it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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