oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
