why do cheetos always look like penises
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
