smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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