You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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