shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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