Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
