seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
You peed on a flamingo?!?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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