You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
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